A day at the Zoo

I had originally planned to take a bus to Phuket town and then get a tuk tuk to the zoo – but was feeling a bit crappy so decided just to get a tuk tuk directly to the zoo from my hotel. I knew anything I caught along the beach front would be overpriced – so cut in through some back streets and went a bit inland. After disagreeing with a few drivers on the price I walked away and one called after me that he’d take me. I knew I had the upper hand as it was early in the day with very little business likely to pick up within the next 2 hours. I was surmised and a bit embarrassed that my tuk tuk turned out to be a brand new merc – leather interior and airconned. Pok was very polite and offered to pick me up and take me back for the same amount. He said he’d wait outside for me – but I told him to go and make some money and exchanged mobile numbers telling him I’d be out at a specific time or would call him.

The Zoo itself is very old, tired and shabby and fantastic. The grounds are meticulously kept clipped, raked and tidied. The cages are old and in many cases you can feed the animals by hand.. including the crocodiles. Animal feed selling stations are everywhere – 20 baht by an honesty system – bananas, seeds, smelly frozen fish, meat – whatever the animals are likely to want to eat – is sold near their cages.

I went in fully understanding that everything I went to see would cost extra – but for the uninitiated, this might seem that you pay to go in and then are constantly handing over small amounts of money the whole day. Well you are and it doesn’t matter. This zoo really is one of a kind and must see.

The very first thing I did was walk to the elephants – but was waylaid by the most magnificent tiger, just sprawled out on a throne slab. 200baht to take a photo of him. My luck with anything touristy was well with me today. Another Australian couple and I were the only visitors for over an hour. As it was so quiet, the tamer let me sit near the tiger and pat him on the head and he took a photo of me. He took a few photos with my camera and then got the other couple to sit with tiger. I took some shots myself and was about to go when the tamer called me over and patted the spot in front of the tiger. He told me to slowly slowly walk and sit. He then said “Lady lie down on tiger”… so I did. I must have moved a bit fast as the next thing I knew I had the jaws of the tiger and his hot stinky breath within centimeters of my nose. The tiger roared.

You know how time slows down and a million things go through your head. The first thing I thought was crap. It’s the monkey thing again – this time my head is going to ripped off. ( on my 30th birthday we were in Gibraltar. I was feeding an ape and it decided it didn’t like me and rushed me and took a chunk out of my shoulder. I have some cool scars after that one.) Next was – oh well – Adrian would be impressed.( he loves tigers above all animals)

The tamer shouted at the tiger and hit him on the nose with his bamboo stick. I looked up at the tamer and realized for the first time that he only had one arm. I had to try very hard not to burst into a fit of hysteria.

Its kind of a pity the tamer didn’t take photos during that time, but he’d dropped my camera to pick his stick up - so I only have ones from before and the strained look afterwards.

I gave the tamer 100baht as a tip and reckon I got out of that cheaply!

The crocodile show was amazing. Those guys are completely insane. Four large croc in water and they are either in the water with them on sitting on them or putting their heads inside their mouths. One stunt this guy does is the croc is on land and facing him with his mouth open. The guy takes a running leap and slides along the ground on his stomach and stops with his head inside the croc mouth. Insane.

The elephant show was pretty cool, along with balancing and dancing to rock music, they played instruments, kicked soccer balls and put basket balls into the hoops. The coolest thing was them painting. The elephants had paintbrushes in their trunks and then chose a colour and walked over to a big easel and started painting. How cool is that? Afterwards they auctioned them off and I bought two – one drew flowers and the other swirls. I think the kids would really like them framed and in their rooms. I doubt many people can say they have art by an elephant!

I even had my photo taken with the elephant that painted the picture and it ‘kissed’ me with its trunk! Man the trunks are so weird – tough and hard and kind of squiggy and hairy too.

I have to say the monkey show was a bit upsetting. Not badly – but just sad in a way. I understand that people want to see performing monkeys and its not even that they are treated badly. I saw in the back – beyond where tourists would normally see, the tamers being very affectionate and connecting with the monkeys while they were waiting to go onto the stage. I guess its not really up to us to judge – different culture and different rules. Also I guess, if tourists didn’t pay or want to see this sort of thing – then it would die out. However the thronging amount of tourists about clambering for photos with the monkeys was enough to cut that idea down in flames.